I’ve seen this facebook post several times and commented on a high school friend’s share. I’ve had this debate just a few times and I really ruffle feathers. Why is hitting children considered sacred and questioning it heresy? Did you know “heresy” means “to choose”? THAT was my only point. We can choose to be better.
I paste it here because no one is going to see this and I want to vent.
Y___ is my friend from high school.
W___ is a guy who was active in local Assembly of God church until he decided he was tired of being married after giving it a good two decade trial.
THE FACEBOOK POST WITH COMMENTS:
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W___: Yes ma’am. Yes sir.
August 2 at 8:11pm · Like · 1
Me (Dawn): Respect can be taught without hitting. In fact, it’s more easily taught by example than by the three-fold message of corporal punishment: 1) might makes right, 2) your body/pain is MY “teaching” tool and 3) conflicts can resolved by hitting. I respect my children and they reciprocate. Think maybe that’s what Jesus meant with the Golden Rule? Or maybe “Suffer the children to come unto me,” was a plea to have kids lined up for some good old-fashioned spanking with the bible belt?
3 hrs · Like
Y___: I didn’t choose how my parents raised me…..
2 hrs · Unlike · 1
W___: Dawn, that’s your opinion & you’re intitled to it.
2 hrs · Like · 1
Me: I know, Y___. Nor did I. And in a way, our parents didn’t choose how to raise us. My rant was to suggest we can choose how to raise our children, and contrary to some conventional “wisdom,” that choice can exclude hitting. And now that I have grown kids who survived not being spanked, I’ve gotten more vocal about suggesting there is a choice. I am often told my kids are very well-behaved and respectful. I don’t tolerate disrespect or bullying, from my kids or self. I’m sorry if my rant offended you. I’ve seen this post several times and just wanted to suggest it may require some scrutiny. No offense was intended.
2 hrs · Like
Me: I know I’m entitled to have an opinion (maybe even allowed to not hit my kids in the misguided guise of good parenting?) but thanks for the snarky and dismissive permission to express an opinion not condoned by the majority of my neighbors.
1 hr · Edited · Like
Y___: Interesting Dawn I did choose to raise mine different. But you didn’t ask that…
1 hr · Like
Me: I didn’t ask because I wasn’t making a judgement on YOU–just this oft-shared post and the prevailing wisdom behind it. I assure you, I meant no ill-will. (Well, except for my third comment.) Not for a second did I think you are a bad parent, or even that your parents are bad. I just want to suggest we can all be a little better by questioning the cliches and dictates we inherited. I accept any animosity thrown my way because my “opinion” is dismissed as unworthy of consideration, much less agreement.
Just now · Like
Y___: Good grief Dawn, the way your posting not many people will listen to you. Ranting is not usually the preferred method of communication or the way to get people’s attention about a subject. I personally have mentors that I call upon to help me with child rearing and that has helped me through this journey of Motherhood…